Coral Gables Historical Archive
Coral Gables Riviera-Times
Thursday, May 29, 1947, page 10 (of 12)
The page
The text of this pageRead by computer from the scan, so some words may be wrong. The page picture is the original.
? LEAVING THE GABLES FOR THE SUMMER? Let Us Protect Your Home From Insects And Mildew While You Are Away.
"An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure" FOR DETAILED INFORMATION AND REFERENCES PHONE 4-2079 MILLER EXTERMINATING COMPANY 2329 Ponce de Leon Blvd. FRANK P. MILLER, Mgr. Civil Engineer
HUSKAMP MOTOR COMPANY
Ford 242 Alhambra Circle PHONE 48-6591 RECONDITION YOUR OLD CAR WITH OUR SPECIALIZED SERVICE Metal Straightening Fenders, Bodies, Rusty Panels, etc., Repaired by Expert Workmen. Complete Painting Factory Methods Using Best Paint. Complete Inside and Out. Seat Covers Convertible Tops Custom Tailored to Fit Your Car. Plastic, Lacquered, Straw or Sailcloth. Chassis Service Wheel Aligning, Wheel Balancing and Rebushing. Steam Cleaning Road Dirt, Grime and Grease Removed by High Pressure Steam.
REALISTIC APPROACH
The Squire, who had a real affection for young people, was deply troubled by the raids made on his orchard and garden by the youngsters of the neighborhood. One day, seeking to win the boys over to honesty by the exercise of kindness and consideration, the old gentleman held a party, at which he stuffed the youngsters with fresh strawberries liberally supplied with cream and sugar. Hoping to draw a lesson from the occasion, the Squire said, "Boys, tell me honestly-would these berries have tasted as good if you had stolen them?" "No, they wouldn't, sir," one bright-eyed youngster replied. "And can you tell me why?" asked the Squire. "Because they wouldn't have had any sugar and cream with them," was the candid reply. EVEN THEM UP Barber-You want your hair parted exactly in the middle, sir? Customer-That's what I said, wasn't it? Barber-Then I'll have to pull out one sir. You only have five hairs. JUNGLE ETIQUETTE A captain of marines from Normandy, relates that one day in the jungles he ran onto a tribe of cannibals who were just about to sit down to their favorite repast. The head of this tribe finally confided to the captain that he had actually attended college in the United States. "Do you mean to say," asked the amazed marine, "that you went to college and that you still eat human beings?" "Oh, yes," replied the chief, "but of course now I use a knife and fork." SPEEDING THINGS UP A number of years ago an entertainment was being held in a Western mining town. A young fellow sang an endless song of which the chorus was "I'm going home, I'm going home, I'm going home tomorrow." Mark Twain who was outside, stuck his head in the window and drawled, "For goodness sake, couldn't you go tonight?"
Test Your I. Q.
1. Can you hear all the notes of an orchestra on your radio? 2. How often do total eclipses of the sun occur? 3. What causes ocean tides? 4. Where is the homeland of the Sudanese people? 5. What nation recently became the 55th United Nations member? Answers 1. No. The average home radio has a frequency range from about 75 to 5000 cycles, which does not take in the highest and lowest musical notes the ear can hear-16 to 16000 2. Two every three years in some parts of the world. Many occur in inaccessible Polar regions. 3. Gravitational pull of the moon, primarily, and of the sun to a lesser extent. 4. The highlands of southwest Java. They are one of the three principal Indonesian races, the others being Javanese and Madurese. 5. Siam.
POOR PA
SHUCKS, JABBER_HERE I OWN A FARM WITH A NICE FISHING PLACE ON IT, BUT SOMEHOW, FISHING ISN'T AS MUCH FUN AS WHEN I WAS A BOY, THERE'S SOMETHING MISSING! NO FISHING NO FISHING POSITIVELY NO FISHING AH! UTOPIA! NO TRESPASSING C.M.PAYNE
PEGGY
WHAT A HORRIBLE MORNING! IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH POP? NO, HE'S JUST TRYING TO FIGURE OUT AN EXCUSE TO STAY HOME FROM WORK I HAVE IT! I'LL PLAY HOOKEY AND YOU SPEND THE DAY LOOKING FOR ME! ALL RIGHT, IT DIDN'T WORK_BUT DID YOU HAVE ANY BETTER PLAN?
MUTT AND JEFF By Bud Fisher
MUTT, IF TWO AND TWO MAKE FOUR, HOW CAN ONE AND THREE MAKE FOUR? BOY ARE YOU STUPID? WHAT MAKES YOU ASK? NO! I'M NOT ASKING WHAT I'M TELLING YOU! DID YOU QUESTION IT? THEN WHY QUESTION DID YOU WHAT? QUESTION IT? MY STUPIDITY I DIDN'T QUESTION IT ONE BIT! YOU DID TOO AND I CAN PROVE IT GO BACK AND READ THE FIRST PICTURE! THERE'S A QUESTION MARK ON THE END OF YOUR SENTENCE PRINTED IN BLACK AND WHITE! OH, WELL, THERE'S OTHER THINGS IN THE PAPER-NEWS, SPORTS EDITORIALS
NANCY By Ernie Bushmiller
--- ON TOP OF SOMEBODY I THINK I'LL PLAY HOUSE WITH MY LITTLE TOY MOP MY DOLL HOUSE NEEDS A GOOD CLEANING NOW I'LL SHAKE IT OUT JUST LIKE A REAL HOUSEWIFE--
LITTLE REGGIE By Margarita
MRS. HIGHTOWER WANTS YOU TO MIND HER BABY---RIGHT AWAY!! BUT I HAVE TO PLAY BASE BALL! NEVER MIND BASEBALL---GO TO MRS. HIGHTOWERS AND DONT GIVE HER ANY EXCUSES! I WON'T GIVE HER ANY EXCUSES...IN FACT I WON'T SAY A WORD! EEEEEEEEEEEK!!! GO AWAY!!
REG'LAR FELLERS By Gene Byrnes
DO I SEE YOU GUZZLIN' A ALL-DAY SUCKER? YOU DO! GOSH--YOU DON'T MIND BEIN' ILLEGAL A BIT, DO YA? WHADDAYA MEAN-- ILLEGAL? TH' SUN WENT DOWN TWO HOURS AGO, IT'S NOW OFFICIALLY NIGHT! WOW! AN' ME SOAKIN' UP A ALL-DAY SUCKER! YOU SHOULDA GOT YASELF A HUNKA LICKRISH! RUBBISH
JITTER By Arthur Pointer
IDEA PEANUTS
VIRGIL By Len Kleis
VIRGIL-IF I'M GOING TO WORK FOR YOU I WANT A HORSE LIKE YOU'VE GOT WHAT'S TH' MATTER WITH TH' ONE I GAVE YOU IT HASN'T ANY HEAD! WHAT'S TH' DIFFERENCE? YOU LOOK LIKE A QUEEN WHEN YOU'RE RIDING IT! THAT ISN'T WHAT MY FRIENDS ARE SAYING! PRONTO DELIVERY
SILENT SAM By Jeff Hayes
GREYHOUND RACES TONIGHT TONIC DAILY CLOS TON
WEEKLY CROSSWORD PUZZLE
HORIZONTAL 1 Depicted country 5 In the war it was-ed 9 Its capital is - 13 Toward 14 Rough lava 15 Genus of plants 16 Footless 17 Era 19 Artificial language 20 Cubic meter 21 Males 22 Grain 24 Tree fruit 25 Not (prefix) 26 Paddle a boat 27 Egypt (abbr.) 29 Its - is 119,000 square miles 32 Earn 36 Full extent 38 Trap 39 Short for opossum 41 Sign 42 Before 43 Father 44 Explosive sound 47 Belongs to it 49 Auto 50 Donkey 53 Vegetable 55 Three (comb. form) 57 Group of eight 59 Boil slowly 60 Disturbance 61 Therefore 62 Sun god 63 Sled for hauling logs 64 Pillage 65 Anesthetic VERTICAL 1 Article 2 Soup-fin shark 3 Varnish ingredient 4 Lout 5 Lure 6 Aged 7 Satellite 8 Exist 9 Rodent 10 Unfasten 11 African finch 12 Paradise 18 Onward 20 Stalks 23 Fear 26 Lift up 28 One of its ports is - 29 High mountain 30 River (Sg.) 31 Type measures 33 Male sheep 34 Anger 35 Nine and one 37 One of its industrial cities is - 40 Encountered 43 Not in verse 44 Piece of timber 45 On top of 46 Piebald 48 Agitate 49 Vatican is located in this countr 50 Near 51 Withered 52 Movie actor 54 Be indebted 56 Fish eggs 58 Folding bed 60 Regius Professor (abbr.) Answer to Previous Puzzle LAKE ONTARIO BA INTERN RE GOT NOT ATT INN ERROR CODE COD REED SERVE PEAS LE LAKE TERROR DRY LC EDEN BE ONTARIO ALLOY ODA KLEEN STERN ASEA EAR LIE GOA ERN NW ATONERS NI ARRANGEMENT
HOME-TOWN ECHOES By C. Kessler
OH, YEAH? YEAH! PORTRAIT OF A HAPPILY MARRIED COUPLE SIX DAYS AFTER MAKING RESOLUTIONS NOT TO DRINK, SMOKE OR PLAY BRIDGE.
Ticklers By George
"We're holding open house this week." NOT SENSITIVE In the mountain country where women never wear shoes their feet become hardened and calloused. One evening Miranda was standing before the hearth with her corn cob pipe hanging listlessly from her mouth. Her husband motioned her aside with a wave of his corn jug. "Step aside, Maw, you're standin' on a live coal." Leisurely she puffed on her pipe then, glancing toward him, "Which foot, Paw?" she asked.
TUTAN MOTORS INC. DODGE "JOB-RATED" TRUCKS
We cater to those who want the best in material and workmanship. We use only the most modern scientific equipment in our repair department. NO JOB TOO LARGE -- NO JOB TOO SMALL Reasonable OPA prices on every repair job. TUTAN MOTORS INC. DODGE "JOB-RATED" TRUCKS DODGE - PLYMOUTH SALES and SERVICE 216 Minorca Avenue Coral Gables Phone 48-1728 COMPLETE REPAIR SERVICE. BODY AND FENDER STRAIGHTENING. EXPERT AUTOMOBILE PAINTING. NEW MOTORS FOR DODGE-PLYMOUTH.